dear authorities

So I went next door to grab something out of D.'s apartment, and stacked on her countertop are box cutters, about 8 or 9 high.

Suspicious? I sure think so. How could I have not known it would be the all-American, "local," lily white, blond girl, who I attended college with and speaks even better English than me. For those who think I'm jumping to conclusions based on incomplete information, did you read about what happened on 9/11? Box cutters might as well be the new secret mafia tattoo.

So now what do I do? I left casually, trying to play it off like I didn't see, but maybe I should have tackled her, started pulling her hair or something? Do I call a number? Is there a number for me to call? In the end I've decided I'm just going to make this post, and hopefully someone with the Authorities will come across it. In the meantime, say a little prayer for me, because I have a terrorist across the hall, who gives me free shoes, lets me borrow her stuff, lends me money, and is good fun in general, but a terrorist all the same.